Stand Up, Speak Up, Stomp Out Bullying

October brings the change of seasons, but it also brings up National Bullying Awareness and Prevention Month. School and organizations everywhere join in and raise awareness on bullying.


Did you know???

160,000

Kids stay home each day to escape bullying

During October, take the time to raise awareness and spread the word.

The month starts with Wear Blue day on October 3rd. Even if you missed it today, it's not too late to pull on a blue shirt and raise awareness.

The week of October 10th-  Make a new friend. Ask someone you don't know to sit with you at lunch or hang out after school. Be a leader and take action. Don't let isolation consume you or someone else.

The week of October 17th- Stand up for others. If you see someone being bullied, stand up and speak out. If you don't feel safe, find an adult.

The week of October 24th- Raise awareness by speaking to others, sharing stories on social media, holding a function, or many other. Creating awareness is one speak closer to ending the epidemic of bullying.

Let's stand up, speak up and stomp out bullying! Together we can all make a difference.


A great organization dedicated to prevention and awareness of bullying:

This is one of my favorites organizations dedicated to prevention and awareness on bullying. Make sure you take the time to see all they do. 

from Stand for the Silent: 

Founded in 2010, Stand for the Silent has fast become one of the leading and most effective anti-bullying organizations. Our mission is simple: bring awareness to bullying and the real devastation it causes.

Stand For The Silent runs solely off of generous donations from those who support our mission. We could not do what we do without each and every one of your giving and caring hearts. We encourage you to get involved in SFTS, in whatever capacity you can. There is nothing too big or small. Stand with us and help us change the world!

Remember: We can each make a difference!

Join me in stomping out bullying.

Best to all,

Becca

Helping a Local Charity

Break from the silence, break from the pain...

The other day, while I was working hard  on editing my book Break From You, I received an email from a close friend. It was a call for help for a charity she has been working closely with over the past year. She informed me that they were in desperate need of food for their shelter.

The charity- The Father Ed Judy House

The Father Ed Judy House is a semi-transitional housing program designed to help homeless women with children , the majority of which are also survivors of domestic violence, find stable housing.

Due to the tightening of state budgets, the hospital that provided meals for the Father Ed Judy House had to triple their prices. The Father Ed Judy House can no longer afford these meals and is reaching out to the community for help.

For more information on the Father Ed Judy House please visit their website at http://fejh.wordpress.com/

Deep in edits, I received this email, and I knew I had to help.

It takes a lot of strength to leave an abusive relationship, especially if you have no where to go. I couldn't image standing at the front door- a roof, food, warmth, clothing- all behind me, and nothing but the unknown in front of me. The Father Ed Judy House provides a place for women of domestic violence to go, so that they are not forced to go back to a unsafe relationship to be fed, clothed, and housed.

This Thursday, a group of us are providing soup and salad for the women of the Father Ed Judy House. I am bringing the bread and butter. (The bread, however, will be store bought instead of home made, since I don't like to bake and I'm allergic to gluten. Besides, store bought bread is a lot better than anything I could ever attempt to make.) And I am excited to help!


As I continue to press forward with the edits Break From You, a young adult novel about dating abuse, I think about Brooke's struggles. I also think about the struggles and heartaches the women of the Father Ed Judy House have endured. Please spread the word, and help your local charity!

If you would like to help, please contact the Father Ed Judy House or a local charity in your area.  Let's join together and help those who are victims of domestic violence. Let's help them break from their pain and stop the cycle of abuse.

Break From You is almost ready for everyone to read. (a short synopsis below)


Break From You

Is love enough? Should it hurt this much? 

Brooke Myers wants to believe she has it all: the perfect guy, the perfect relationship, the perfect life. She wants to believe it so much, she’s willing to overlook all the pain her boyfriend, Drew, has caused her and forgive him for it. She always forgives. And she loves him. Her love for him has caused her to push away her friends, and she has stopped doing the things she once enjoyed so that she can be with him. She knows it isn’t right, but she keeps telling herself that love isn’t always easy. Then she finds herself lost in the middle of a burning restaurant  during homecoming dinner, and it isn’t Drew that saves her but the new boy, Cooper West. She forms an instant bond with Cooper, one Drew wouldn’t like. With the pain of a concussion reminding her of how bad things can get, she is forced to re-evaluate the abusive relationship she has with Drew and face the ghosts that haunt her. She once believed love was all it took…but is it enough? Is it truly love when you've lost yourself in it?

Have You Seen 'Bully' Yet?

The documentary 'Bully' opened on April 13, 2012 in 72 theaters in over 25 cities, and that wasn't enough. This powerful and influential film is a definite must see for all ages, everywhere. Parents, students, educators...everyone should be lining up to view it.

My fear? With a topic so incredibly tough and heart wrenching, people will want to pass it by or not take their kids because it's too hard to talk about.

'Bully' is tear-jerking, painful, and shocking. The film is hard to watch. No one wants to think that this is going on around them.

But sadly, it is.

Bullying is happening every day, in every city, in every school. And it doesn't stop there, not with the internet and cell phones.

According to The Bully Project website, over 13 million kids will be bullied this year in the U.S. (thebullyproject.com)

That's a problem!

The documentary 'Bully' follows three amazing young teens through the course of their 2009-10 school year, and two resilient families fight for awareness after the loss of their sons to suicide. The intense bullying that these young people endured each and every day is not only painful but harsh and disturbing. Many superiors stood by, refusing to acknowledge that there was a problem with bullying in their schools. Principals failed to intervene time and time again. In fact, the bullying becomes so bad during the filming that filmmakers fear for one of the boy’s safety and end up showing the footage to his parents and administrators.

The documentary was beautifully done. It dug deep and showed the horrifying results of bullying. I cried through the entire film and sadly forgot my box of tissues. The film ends in with a positive note, bringing everyone together to fight and take a stand. The message- Stand for the Silent.

Some critics argue that the film presented the problem but fails to go into the root causes of bullying or offer any true solutions. My response- we have to admit there is a problem before we can find a solution. That is what the film does; It shows us that there is clearly a huge problem with bullying.

Bullying is hurtful. It isn't conflict between two individuals on equal ground; It's harassment. It's one person taking advantage of their power to destroy and control someone who is weaker. Bullying causes damage. No one deserves to be treated with such extreme. No one should have to go to school and face intense pain every day. Our schools should be a safe place.

Please take the first step and see the film. Admit that we have a problem with bullying.


Check out-   
standforthesilent.org "There mission is simple- End bullying. Saves lives."
thebullyproject.com "Make a difference, join the movement."

Restricted "Bully"

Have you heard about the movie “Bully” yet?

“Bully,” a new documentary film directed by Sundance and Lee Hirsch, offers an intimate look at how bullying has effected five kids and their families. It was filmed during 2009/2010 school year and is planned to be released in select theaters on March 30, 2012. (thebullyproject.org)

The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) has given this film an R rating.

The rating has stirred a lot of controversy.

Some say it is hard to watch because of the profanities, violence and raw emotions and would leave teens and younger audience shaken.  (Funny- since that is what bulling does…don’t you think?)

A Michigan teen has started an on-line petition and has been joined by members of congress, celebrities, and other high profile individuals in hopes of lowering the R rating to PG-13. Those against the R rating feel it will stop the intended audience from viewing it.

The MPAA provides film ratings so that parents can determine what movies are appropriate for their children to see and still allow freedom of expression for filmmakers. The ratings do not determine if the movie is good, only the level of various material it contains. The ratings are determined by a board of parents independent from the film and film makers. The ratings consist of G- general audiences, PG- parental guidance suggested, PG13- parents strongly advised, may not be appropriate for children under the age of 13, R- restricted, children under 17 must be accompanied by an adult, not appropriate for young children, and NC17- no one under 17 admitted. (For more information on these ratings please go to mpaa.org)

The biggest concern with the restricted rating for "Bully" is that the film will not be seen by its intended audience nor will it be able to be shown in schools or other groups for educational purposes. 

So we ask ourselves- Do films like the documentary "Bully" provide us with the opportunity to talk about tough issues and promote awareness? If so, will the restrictive rating stop us from doing so?

I haven't seen the movie yet, but from my understanding the R rating is due to inappropriate language. The director has stated that he refuses to edit the content because it will take away from the impact of the bullying. The ten member panel of parents representing the MPAA refuses to lower the rating. Is the MPAA outdated and remote?

We head out into this world everyday, faced with the harsh language, violent acts, and raw emotional pain from others. Profanities are yelled in public areas, school buses, cafeterias, and just about anywhere you can think of each and every day. Our lives are not restricted. What we hear is not filtered. The negative things that happens to us are not edited out.

Are we thinking that if we don't read about it, talk about it, see it, then it will all just go away???

According to the thebullyproject.org, over 13 million kids in the United States will be bullied this year, making bullying the most common form of violence among youth.  I don't think the problem of bullying is going to go away.

Of course we want to shield ourselves (our children, our friends, our family, everyone) from harsh words, violence, and emotional pain, but I'm not so sure it's the movie we're trying to protect ourselves from. Don't we want to be protected from bullying and violence in our schools, workplaces, and public areas? Will being stopped from seeing a movie do that? Or will seeing the movie and talking about it be more effective?...

Will the R rating stop you from seeing the film?

Continue to Raise Awareness!

Hearts on your sleeve, shoelaces, socks...whatever it might be, make sure you find a way to start the conversation on dating abuse. The month of February has ended but raising awareness and prevention about dating abuse shouldn't.

As I sat back and watched the Huguely trial this month, I was reminded of how prevalent dating abuse is in our society. Stories of abuse surface in our news regularly, a scary observation considering how the majority of victims remain silent.

Yet, we are still confused by abuse. Those having never experienced abuse before are wondering how anyone would ever let it happen, why the abused person didn't just leave. Those caught in the cycle of abuse are continuing to make and accept excuses, allowing the pattern to repeat itself over and over. Maybe the Huguely trial can remind us of how hard it is to break from abusiveness and therefore increase the need for prevention and awareness.

George Westley Huguely was born in September of 1987. He grew up in Maryland, attending an all-boys school and excelling in both lacrosse and football. He went on to attend the University of Virgina where he continued to play lacrosse. He formed a relationship with Yeardley Love, a member of the lacrosse and field hockey teams. Yeardley Love was found dead in her apartment on the morning of May 3, 2010. Cause of death was blunt force trauma. George Huguely was arrested on the suspicion of her death.

George Huguely was charged with first degree murder, felony murder, robbery of a residence, burglary, entering a house with an intent to commit a felony, and grand larceny. His trail took place during the month of February 2012. Throughout the trail, it was reported that he kept his head down, displaying clear signs of remorse. The defense presented many excuses for Huguely and his behavior and explained that he didn't mean to kill her. George Huguely's attorneys told juriors that he had made mistakes and was "immersed in a life of sports, sex, and alcohol." Regardless of the excuses, Yeardley Love was dead. The facts were presented. Witnesses took the stand. (For more information please google Huguely trail)

The jury felt he didn't mean it. Thank goodness they didn't excuse it. On February 22, 2012, George Huguely was found guilty of second degree murder and grand larceny. He is being held in the Albemarle-Charlottesville Regional Jail, awaiting sentencing.

During a press conference, the prosecution stated that there were "no winners, nothing but loss everywhere."

This case reminds us that abuse is everywhere and can happen to anyone, regardless of race, social economic status, sexual orientation, age, religion, or gender.  Abuse can be in the form of emotional, physical, sexual, economical, or psychological. Abuse can get bad, bad enough to cause death.

Even though February had ended, the reasons to raise awareness and prevention have not. Get out there and continue to where your heart on your sleeve!

My Heart is on My Sleeve!

February is National Teen Dating Violence Prevention and Awareness Month.

The statistics are ugly. The numbers are only rising. According to the Center for Disease Control (cdc.gov), nearly 10% of high school students report being hit, slapped, or physically abused by a dating partner. Another survey states that one in three teens are a victim of physical, emotional, or verbal abuse from a dating partner (teendvmonth.org). Only 33% of teens who are in an abusive relationship will report the abuse, and 81% of parents believe teen dating violence is not an issue or admit they don’t know if it’s an issue (teendvmonth.org).

This year someone you know will be physically, emotionally, or verbally abused, and they probably won’t tell you. It’s time to talk openly about healthy and unhealthy relationships. It's time to raise awareness, to provide education, and to promote prevention.

For the entire month of February, wear your heart on your sleeve. I am! Make your own or go online to download an already designed heart.

Get the conversation started. Spread the word. Prevent the cycle of abuse.